I am Kayla! Your friendly, neighbourhood Short Term Coordinator!
Yesterday, I was asked: “Kayla tell me, what are your goals? What are your dreams?” I froze a little, all I could think of were the goals and dreams I once had: to be a physiotherapist and curling (the sport) superstar *insert cheering crowd and confetti*; I yearned for it, I wanted it soo badly, and yet, now, the idea seems so frivolous, so mediocre. It startled me that I couldn’t think of anything aside from what I’d wanted in the past. I felt like such a loser. Who doesn’t have a quick response to that question? Everyone has goals, everyone has dreams, why couldn’t I put anything into words? – Something concise, something that would be received easily like, “oh yea, Kayla,*insert thumbs up and a crisp high five* that’s a great goal!”
Wanting to have a concise response seems to be a bit of a theme. I get asked about what it is that I do and sometimes I feel almost embarrassed when I try to explain. The responses are usually something along the lines of: “ah, short term coordinator? What is that? Oh I see, so you coordinate all things related to short term missions. So how many teams do you get? Oh… just ONE a year? That’s a not very many…how many individuals do you have right now? None?!? Wow…so what do you even do with your time?” which can leave me feeling judged, like I have to prove myself, to justify my calling, or explain all the other aspects of my relational ministry, and be tempted into feeling like they aren’t even things. Which can avalanche into me wondering if I am doing something wrong or not managing my time appropriately. I have emotional ups and downs, some days I feel very productive and others like an incompetent bum. At times, I long for a quick, short response that doesn’t require explanation: “I build houses” or “I train the local soccer team” but then other days I’m so delighted that I don’t have a quick wrap it up and send it on it’s way response, because my eclectic, at times lengthy, response requires spending time with someone and even though I might feel pressured to, I don’t have to validate myself to everyone.
I have those moments where I feel that I don’t do enough, that I’m not trying hard enough, that I am not enough. Reality is, I am enough. I am doing what I have been called to do, to be present, to be available, to encourage, to be genuine. I strategically placed myself in side projects where they don’t need me in order to function. Why? It gives me freedom to be flexible, it means if I get called to a meeting or someone needs some help I can go and the machine keeps running. It requires teamwork, community, fellowship and helps prevent developing a God complex (which is when people get sucked into thinking that they are the reason that something is working vs. the reality that God is actually the one running the ship).
The woman who runs the sewing group came up to me last week and out of no where said “You are such a great help to me!” What do I even do? I don’t bring her supplies? I don’t help her teach? I literally sit in her class, demand hugs, giggle, and simply spend time with the women and their children. “You are here, we love you, and we love spending time with you!”
This idea of being present and
intentionally ‘hanging out’ was what I tried to instil to this year’s Step team! And they nailed it! It was such a huge success! God is so good! The team picked up what was being thrown at them, they were so flexible and great! The experience was so incredibly positive, the community was welcoming and absolutely adored the team. We were able to slide into the routine of the town and be present with them. We were able to get into the local (secular) school and twice a day witness to the children and teachers through English lessons, music, and crafts, that Jesus loves them. 
They even tried nanches (it’s a type of fruit): --> CLICK HERE TO SEE!!!
Praise!
my visa trip went oh so smooth – aside from the 3 hour wait on the tarmac….but government official wise- SO GREAT! 
- Step team was a DREAM!
“Faith is the confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.” Hebrews 1:11
Prayer
- One of our Stay members has been having some complications with her eyes, please pray for complete healing and that the pressure would stabilize and she would be blessed with full sight.
- I’ve got some sort of congestion going on, it’s rather annoying and I would just love for my body to be healthy and immune to the smog/ash and general things in the air that make my throat scratchy and my nose stuffy.
- I have some potential Striders in the works and there are a few of which I have no idea what to do. I would love to have some peace and insight into what I should do and for a project to reveal itself if this is where these Striders are to be.
