wait wait wait wait wait….

yes, that is to the tune of that Rihanna song…it’s so catchy!  

² When I was in deep trouble,
I searched for the Lord.
All night long I prayed, with hands lifted toward heaven,
but my soul was not comforted.
³ I think of God, and I moan,
overwhelmed with longing for his help…

⁴ You don’t let me sleep.
I am too distressed even to pray!
⁵ I think of the good old days,
long since ended,
⁶ when my nights were filled with joyful songs.
I search my soul and ponder the difference now.

…

But then I recall all you have done, O Lord;
I remember your wonderful deeds of long ago.
¹² They are constantly in my thoughts.
I cannot stop thinking about your mighty works.

¹³ O God, your ways are holy.
Is there any god as mighty as you?
¹⁴ You are the God of great wonders!
You demonstrate your awesome power among the nations.

 Psalm 77: 2-6; 11-14 (NLT)

My words are not sufficient to describe the feelings I have been having the past few months, there are moments when I feel just amazing, totally energized on a Jesus high and then others where I feel like a complete idiot so pathetic and weak.  Many times I have just sighed and been like “Jesus, buddy….what in the world is going on here?!?!”  I look in the mirror profoundly and ask “who am i?!” heehee, kidding!  Okay that may have happened…like once …maybe twice ;)

Feelings are so interesting, I’ve been told numerous times that I am a big hearted person, that I care so deeply, love harder (whatever that means).  Which, I see as a compliment and I’m very grateful for this gift God has given me.  There are many benefits, but there is also a greater risk and likelihood to be put in the line of fire, to feel hurt that much deeper.  I get frustrated that I have a hard time releasing, I will feel like my brain and feelings just won’t connect.  My brain will say “hey!  You are actually fine, life is great, God’s totally got you covered!  He works everything out for YOUR good!  Pretty sure He’s not trying to screw you over or psych you into going down the wrong path!”  then my feels will get involved and be like “Well, actually, we are hurt/upset so that trumps everything, also, please remember that you should feel sucky, ridiculous, and awkward! Ps. have you gained weight?”  Oh Satan, he is good.  I can see you all scratching your heads “Excuse me Kayla?! But WHAT?!  How did you get not only one mission agency to want you …but two with theology like that??”  Let me finish!  He is good…at being sneaky!!!  You give the tiniest, teeniest smidge of space and he creeps in and just harasses – sneakily and sometimes not so sneakily; he’ll just throw stuff in your face!  He DOES NOT play fair, his sportsmanship is poor – he wouldn’t make a very good curler that’s for sure!

Some things I have been pondering as of late:
-- I have had an empathy overload (An empathetic person is someone who can share another person's feelings. If you tell an empathetic person that your heart is broken, she might touch her own heart and gaze at you sadly through moist eyes.- that definition brought to you by Google) and it has brought me to a place of such deep hurt, sometimes it feels like it’s out of control.  What do you do when you get yourself down to someone’s level (for example you get into the hole with them, but then they climb out of the hole and take the ladder with them…)--

--Recognizing your issues vs. actually working them out--

--Failure is part of the process – dust me off so I can swing for the fences again!--

--God is not interested in just getting the job done – He’s wanting us to experience HIM.--

--Am I trying to shape my circumstances OR am I letting them shape me?--

--What am I afraid of? – many things as it turns out!--

“This is the boisterous city,
once so secure.
“I am the greatest!” it boasted.
“No other city can compare with me!”
But now, look how it has become an utter ruin,
a haven for wild animals.
Everyone passing by will laugh in derision
and shake a defiant fist.”
------------------------------------------Zeph 2:15
To me this speaks of the importance of humility, it’s important to keep yourself in check.  Also, I just think it the part about shaking a defiant fist is hilarious, who doesn’t love a good fist shake! 

PRAISE!!!

We’ve been praying for solid friendship and it’s been revealed! During these rough few months I have been overwhelmed by the support I have seen not only from friends overseas, but right here in my neighbourhood.  I have found myself being more candid and much more vulnerable, sometimes I would have moments of fear, realizing how much I had let someone in, worried what they must think of me.  However, instead of dwelling and playing the ‘what if’ game I reminded myself that vulnerability (when done in a safe space) has power.  It has the ability to strengthen friendship, create a space for growth, allow for expression.   I have a quote on my desktop which reads “A woman of beauty offers others the grace to be and the room to become…in her presence we can release tension and pressure that often grips our hearts”  My goal is to be a woman of beauty, and I am happy to report that God has placed many beautiful women in my life!  

Sometimes there are no words, you just need someone to sit with you, listen to you whine and then remind you that you are not alone and that God really does care. It’s okay to lose your marbles a bit. It’s okay to cry.  It’s okay to be weak.

Arduous times are SO exciting!  Why you ponder?  Well…

1. Jesus loves me enough to correct me!  If I’m doing something wrong – which is almost never…obviously! *insert witty smirk
2. I’m going to be better – my faith is being stretched
   1. I have reflected on 2015 Kayla, and 2016 Kayla is kinda blowing her outta the water….haha yes I am in competition with myself…
3. It’s an opportunity for great joy as one of my favourite Bible book writers, James, says (James 1:2).  It’s so fun to make a list of things I’m grateful for and watch my perspective shift and to be just gleeful (haha what a great word- it’s a real one too, I checked: http://www.dictionary.com/browse/gleeful!)

 

I’ve been able to go up to an indigenous reserve in Talamanca to serve with my local church during their mission week in this community – which does not let in just any outsiders!  It’s all very exciting!  I was there yesterday and today and made like million friends!  Lord willing, I will go back this weekend to continue spreading the love – and delicious coffee…turns out, I still make a good cuppa joe!

I had Canadian visitors who stole me away from the daily grind and whisked me off for a few days of work-free fun!!!

PRAYER!!!

1. This weekend I will hopefully be returning to the reserve, please pray for the message of God’s love to really resonate in everyone involved!  That there would be an atmosphere of comradery and joy.  The visual I have is just a giant hug…
2. On Monday, my 3 striders and I are off to Panama so that
   1. To have a mini retreat - all my girls are done their placements in August and will be heading back to their home countries.  It’s sad, but part of the job…however, if their passports happen to go missing I guess they’ll just have to stay with me forever! 
   2. 
      Please pray that we have a safe and super fun time, that we don’t get hassled anywhere and make it safely there and back
3. August of Awesomeness is almost upon us (AKA what I’m calling my August STEP team this year).  My goals include no one dying (if you weren’t around last year here’s the post: i want to burn out bright!: your faith is all it takes… ) and to create an environment which cultivates growth so that my Steppers can walk away with a deeper understanding of who God is and what He means to them!  Also,  unrelated to the team but a goal I have is to watch all the Die Hard movies, in order – I know, it’s all very spiritual!
4.  I want to be flabbergasted by God’s greatness! Pray I will have eyes to see and ears to hear!

Also, just a heads up but as of late I’ve been thinking that it’s been a very long time since I’ve made one of my infamous update videos.  So I’ve put it on my to do list!  I know you’re freaking out!  It will be amazing!  And now that I've told you, I'm bound to hacerlo – accountability! That’s how you get things done!

I will let you get on with your lives now, to bid you adieu here’s one of my Striders and I reppin’ it for the Great White North.  Happy Belated Canada Day!

“Existe la inmensa alegria de vivir y de ser justos, pero ante todo existe la inmensa alegria de servir”

- Gabriela Mistral

I bet I know what you are thinking!  “Kayla?  I do not espeak the espanish how am I supposed to know you didn’t just insult my mother…” 
Don’t worry, I didn’t!  I found the quote in my planner and really liked it.  I had never heard of Gabriela Mistral (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gabriela_Mistral) before, as it turns out she was a humanitarian from Chile.  She’s quoted as saying that there is great joy in living and being fair but before all those things is the immense joy of serving [!] 
As someone who loves serving others, I had to admit she made an excellent point!
This past month and a bit has played around with my morale, I have been slapped in the face a few times (metaphorically, heehee and once literally – but I deserved it!).  A friend of mine –  Damaris, with whom I serve in the Sewing ministry- shared a story about this fishery that needed to move some Salmon across the country.  SO they packed up a moving tank and shipped the fish off.  When the tank arrived at it’s destination,  all the fish inside were dead!  The workers were trying to figure out what when wrong, how they could fix this mystery problem etc.  One day, one of the lower level workers suggested that the reason the fish died was because salmon cannot remain motionless, they need to be continually moving.  He said that in the next shipment they should put some catfish in the tank too.  Catfish are bottom dwellers and would stay at the bottom of the tank and ensure that the salmon remained in motion during the trip (I guess because if the salmon got too close the catfish would nip them?  haha that never came up in the story).  Anyways, they did just that and all the fish in the second tank made it alive.  So after explaining this she talked about how God puts catfish into our lives to keep us moving and on our toes!
I think that most people can be like the salmon in the first tank, staying still and dying!!!  Okay, dying is a bit dramatic, basically we can lose our motivation/momentum or just not make a conscious effort to move forward and wind up drifting and not reaching our full potential… and dying! heehee okay, not dying right away, hmm but actually, yes,  we will all die.. eventually… which is why we need Jesus!  *insert cheering crowd
I recently had some work evaluations and walked out of one feeling completely deflated.  I had taken a hard look at where I was at, what I have faced recently, how I was feeling, looking at some of my character flaws (i know you don’t believe I have any, but I too, am just a regular person and am flawed!).  I was disappointed with myself,  feeling like a loser trying to figure out what went wrong and why I couldn’t just have everything together – you know – like everyone else!  Comparison is the best way to establish where you are at no?
Kidding!
So i decided that I was going to enjoy my ‘catfish’ and take advantage of the reality that each day is new and I’m not as big of a loser as I was allowing myself to think!  I also ran across these verses multiple times in multiple Psalms:

Why am I discouraged?
Why is my heart so sad?
I will put my hope in God!
I will praise him again – my saviour and my God. (psalm 42, 43..)

And I said to myself “Yea Kayla!  What’s your deal? Why are you so sad?”
I had been a bit wrapped up in all my discouraging news and had taken to whining to God and asking him to help a sister out with some strength and peace.  Not a bad response, however, I was letting the sadness overpower the joy we are to have in the face of problems (Romans 5:3).  I half heartedly was thanking him for the wonderful opportunities these sucky situations were going to provide!

“I waited patiently for the Lord to help me and he turned to me and heard my cry.  He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and mire.  He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as i walked along.  He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God.  Many will see what he has done and be amazed.  They will put their trust in the Lord.”Psalm 40:1 –3

Amen! Right?! That’s pretty exciting stuff, I felt/feel so honoured that God is going to use me to lead others to him!  When I read this verse names of people popped into my head and I got so excited and imagined them giving their lives to the Lord.  A few days later one of the people I’d thought of reached out to me and asked me why I do what I do, wouldn’t it just be easier to serve in Canada where I wouldn’t have to face these setbacks… I got to share a bit about what it’s like to trust God and just because things aren’t easy doesn’t mean they’re not worthwhile and we aren’t called to do them.  It was just a great time! 
Praise!
English – I am teaching the advanced class and am really enjoying it, i get to see many friends and as this group has a bit more understanding (and they’re a bit older) than the beginner class I am able to have more fun with the content and on the whole, feel more effective!

Neighbour kids – They came to visit me the other day and coloured me some pictures!


Sewing class – we’re learning to make clothes! and I memorized all the measurements and won a prize!  All the ladies cheered for me – we had a moment, it was great!
 Beach – faced my fear of water!  Last week a friend invited me to go paddle boarding- yes most of you are like “ah Kayla! that’s the praise isn’t it?!” WRONG! For those of you who know me a bit better, you will know that I have a fairly intense and at times irrational fear of lakes, oceans – basically any body of water that is large and has things living in it (darn you National Geographic! I love you but you put too many ideas into my head!).  So, occasionally I will try to face my fear, you know keep myself on my toes – fear will not define me!
We went, had the intro and the two guys working kind of see me going pale and just staring at the water haha – so mellow dramatic!  But I was determined!  So I get out into the water: Step 1!  Success!  Then, if you are familiar with paddle boarding you know that you start on your tummy, then move to your knees, then you stand up!  We got fairly out into the bay and I was doing not too bad, just focused on paddling and then the instructor was like “Right, lets stand up” …I’m pretty sure I laughed at him and said “actually I prefer the view from knee level” …fast forward…I had decided that it was time to give it a go, you can’t go paddle boarding and NOT stand up!  So I go for it and the first attempt proved not successful as a wave came and I quickly dropped back down.  On my second attempt (haha embarrassingly about 10 minutes later) I managed to get up! YAY!  I  must have looked like a crazy person, my knees were trembling so badly from the nerves – however! I did not fall! and by the end of our time I was only shaking a little!  I also got to see a school of fish up closeish – at the time I couldn’t decide if i was excited or petrified as I had just watched on Planet Earth the same type of fish surfacing before a humpback whale emerged from the depths!
School – Today I went and picked up my work booklet for my first class  – which starts next Friday!
Visits - One of my favourite Canadians came to stay with me for a few days!
Step – Plans are in motion for the August team!


Prayer:

• Damaris (my friend and director of the Sewing ministry) has developed a weird, painful growth on her finger.  Please pray that either God will heal it up overnight, miracle style!  Or he will provide the knowledge of what it is and how to treat it to a medical professional.  She has seen a doctor who had no idea what it could be.

• We said ‘see you later’ to one of our Striders, Jana,  (she had been here since I arrived in 2014) – please pray that the Lord will guide her and prepare her next steps, ideally, letting her in on them!
• Another Strider tragically lost her grandfather last week, please keep her and her family in your prayers.  Pray that the Lord will use this shock and time of mourning to draw the family to Him (they are non-believers).  Pray they will find comfort in Him.
• This weekend I have a trip to see a future collaboration project (an adventure camp!)  Pray that God will bless the time, travel, and that  we will be able to see the potential and be able to work together!

I hope you have just an amazing rest of your week!  Thank you SO much for your prayers and support.  May God bless you abundantly and show up in every facet of your lives! 
Big hugs!
Kayla!

April showers bring May flowers

May that be the case, since getting back to Costa Rica last week I feel that I have been running around like a chicken with her head cut off  (which I’ve actually seen… it’s not pretty, actually now I regret bringing it up, sorry!).   Also, our rainy season should be starting anytime now so it will probably be more like April showers pre-soak you for May showers… Oh well, that’s why God made umbrellas right? 
My time in Canada was good, the time was spent catching up with friends, supporters, family, doing some fundraising, and I had a few weddings to attend.  It was really fun to see so many people – more than once!  Some of my highlights were being able to take in so many nice walks, some seriously encouraging talks, playing a little softball and driving!  Oooh I love driving – when there’s no traffic! 

Just a few pictures: some of the weddings, some babies, some grandparent PDA, me doing a presentation, a hug… a little bit of everything

Now to business!
Praise!

 I’ve had so many visitors this past week (missionaries from Nicaragua, a few couples from Canada!)  It was a great way to transition back in!

My home was still in one piece when i got back!  Not all my plants were thriving BUT they were all alive, so we’re calling it a win!

The Canadian dollar has gone up in value!!!

I got a new monthly donor!

God blesses you who are poor, for the Kingdom of God is yours.
God blesses you who are hungry now, for you will be satisfied.
God blesses you who weep now, for in due time you will laugh.
What blessings await you…be happy! Yes, leap for joy! 
                                                                                                                          Luke 6:20-23

One of the things I love about verses like this is that it doesn’t say maybe or it’s possible it says will  You will be satisfied! You will laugh!  For me the ‘will’ is so encouraging, it gives me confidence.  Even when things seem impossible and there doesn’t seem to be a solution or end in sight you can hold on the hope that verses like this instil – one day, it will happen!

Prayer!

One of the Striders (short term missionaries) under my care is leaving us in 3 weeks – please pray that God will give her peace and allow her to be able to do all that she needs to before leaving.  She’s been here since I first arrived so it will be quite sad to say ‘see you later’   Please also prayer for her transition back (She’s from Slovakia) and for her family, her father was diagnosed with cancer last year.

This is also a praise!  I’m going to be going back to school!  I’m going to be looking at seminaries here in Costa Rica to see what’s available.  Please pray that God will guide me to the right school/classes, that He will provide financially and that the experience will be super beneficial, not only for my biblical knowledge but also my Spanish! 

We’re at the less than one week mark!

Everything feels so surreal, I cannot really even imagine that in less than one week I will be, Lord willing, up North… This year has gotten off to such a speedy start!  It’s exciting and right now I am a mix of emotions.  I’m nervous to be away for so long, sad to miss out on this time with my new missionaries, however, the joy of being able to see all my friends and family in the lower mainland is slowly surpassing the nerves!  I know the 6 weeks will seemingly fly by, like these past two months have, it’s so fun to have so much to do!  I’ve been LOVING having my pollitos (that’s what I call the girls I’m responsible for- I feel like a mother hen with her little chicks)
Since you last read my rantings I’ve been to, and froze, in Guatemala.  We had our annual Central American conference which went really well …aside from the 10° weather!  I’m not going to lie, I wore like all my clothes, and wrapped myself up in a blanket for the majority of the time there.  It was a great trip,  I went a few days early to see a friend and we took some of the short termers from Nicaragua with us to do some touristy activities.

Highlights of the conference:

• I gave my presentation/review of 2015 and what’s planned for 2016 in front of the group (with a microphone) and didn’t throw up on anyone!

* Spending time with the other Latin Link members in Central America and Mexico!

• I found and quickly snuggled a baby goat!

• The gentleman who did our morning devos nailed it each morning!  He had great insight and awesome anecdotes!  My favourite was about this blind man who was at a friends house visiting and just having a blast and then once it was time to head home (in the dark) his friend gave him a lamp to walk home with.  The blind man of course could not see and questioned why he would need a lamp, his friend explained that the lamp was not for him but for others to see him to avoid crashing into each other.  So the blind man took the lamp and started walking home, during his walk he was hit by someone, the blind man angrily demanded to know how the other guy managed to run into him when he had a lamp and was clearly visible.  To which the other guy responded by saying that the lamp was nearly out and it was very difficult to see. 
  Then we were asked how our lamps are.  The lamp was a metaphor for faith/relationship with God.  We may think that our lamp is strong and bright but reality may be that we are just barely shining and not lighting anything up. 
  There was also another one with a man hanging off a branch over a cliff – he prayed to God asking to be saved.  God told him if he let go of the branch and he would be saved.  The man, couldn’t let go- he had to cling to the branch.  The branch is a reference to anything of this world vs. Christ. 
  These two stories stuck with me I pondered over branches that I have in my life and the brightness of my lamp.  No profound responses came from these ponderings but it was definitely beneficial to take time to think about :) 

There is so much to be grateful this month!  I have seen so much growth on the work front, deepened friendships, felt more at home… ah how the list could go on!  BUT I must pack!  I only have 5 more days left to prep everything :)
Which leads us to some prayer points to wrap up!
Please pray for my trip, that all my luggage comes with me, that nothing gets lost and that I don’t get sick and am able to rest.  Please also pray that I meet with and see everyone I need to see that my time is restful, productive, and just excellent!  AH!  I can’t even believe that this is happening!

“We put our hope in the Lord.  He is our help and our shield in Him our hearts rejoice for we trust in His holy name.  Let your unfailing love surround us, Lord for our hope is in you alone!”

Psalm 33: 20-22

February 1st!?!?

Hello world!
I have just come home from dropping off my TWO striders (short term missionaries) at the language institute; if I didn’t feel like a mom before – after dropping my kids off at school-  I certainly do now!
The past month has been quite good, my work load has tripled, there is a lot being planned for the year, my home feels much more homey (thanks to some homemade furniture from some cement blocks and pallets I found in the street!).  January was good – I cannot believe that is is already February!!!  In a few weeks we have our annual Central America Team Conference, which is in Guatemala this year!  Then after a week or so back in CR, Lord willing, I will be heading North to visit the homeland!!!*insert Canadian anthem playing in the background.

This year has started off wonderfully, many times things have felt surreal, and other times, the feelings just body slam you to the ground!  Emotions are a funny thing, they love to travel and explore (joy…excitement…anger…sadness..take a turn back to joy…quick stop to see fear…doubt…joy..the journey is never ending).  We’re only 32 days into the year and I’ve already picked up souvenirs from a number of stops!

I am the vine; you are the branches.  If you remain in me and I in you,
you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.
– John 15:5

So this month’s key issues seemed to revolve around my attitude.  Sometimes it was great, other times I felt that there was room for improvement.  As mentioned above, emotions take their toll on how you see things, and when not kept in check, your emotions can distract you from what God is trying to tell you.  For example, when God called Moses to go and free the Israelites from Egypt (Exodus 3-4) he responded in doubt and fear, saying he wasn’t capable, he was full of ‘what ifs?’ ‘how can i?’ ‘i can’t’   to be honest reading it I thought to myself “Man! Moses!  Stop being such a butthead, pull yourself together!  God was super clear…what’s to not get?!  You can’t lose! Just go, leave all you know, go back to the place where people wanted to kill you and tell the Pharaoh that you’d like your relatives back!”  Easy peasy! 
In all seriousness though,  I do think about the fact that God spoke to Moses and told him what to do, and I do wonder why he panicked but actually, Moses and Kayla are a lot alike.  Many times I question God.  I wonder what I am doing, I doubt my abilities, I evaluate myself based on worldly perspective or how i feel…*insert gasp!  I feel like if I was reading about myself in the Bible i would smack myself on the forehead – and just like with Moses- be yelling at my Bible “Come on Kayla!! You are better than this!  You know better! Feelings are NOT sufficient evaluating tools and comparing yourself to others NEVER ends pretty!” 

Reality is that human reasoning will not give me God’s perspective!  Punto! (that’s Spanish for Bam! Case closed!)  God sees things differently than we do, he uses ordinary people, weak and despised things because out of those He can receive the greatest glory (1 Corinthians 1:26-31).  My decisions and evaluations need to be based on biblical principles –how did God deal with similar things in the Bible?  How should i see myself according to the Bible?  Recently, I was having some down time with JC and realized that I’m so in love with him that it physically hurts me that I can’t hug him.  I feel like the anxiety/stress/nerves would just leave me and I would be completely reenergized with an engulfing hug!  But, for now, I have to suffice with seeing Jesus in others and giving them his hugs (Matthew 25:40).
Psalm 81:10 God says “Open wide your mouth and I will fill it” 

“Open wide your arms and I will fill them!” 
- Kayla

Praise
“I said to the Lord, “You are my master! Every good thing I have comes from you” Psalm 16
- I am delighted to announce that i finally have my debit card! (Picked it up on Saturday!)
- This week TWO new short term missionaries joined the ranks:
         - Sophie will be working in a daycare in an at risk neighbourhood
         - Lexie will be working with university students doing outreach and discipleship
- My sinuses are much better than they were last year!
- A student of mine was in the hospital for a few weeks with an alarming illness and is now recuperating at home!
- Recently, a friend finally got to go meet Jesus face to face! *Also a prayer request, for the family and friends who will miss him from here.- My brother, Graham, has announced that he is coming to visit!!!
- I was given a desk!  With free delivery!
- My old roommate Marianela came back to visit for a night!  We had a great catch up!
- Living here is not all bureaucratic stress, I have some great relationships and super grateful to be able to wake up to sun and Spanish!

Prayer”Some trust in chariots and some in horses but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.”  Ps 20:7- I am delighted to have my new debit card, however, none of the ATMs will let me take out more than $130 …so far!
- To rest and give (and actually give them over and have peace) my stressors to the Lord.
- For direction and clarity to what God is trying to teach me.
- That He would give me confidence in where I am and guide me in how to receive and respond to the, more recent, onset of fear inducing comments from others.
- For nourishing and fun friendships.

IT's HERE!!!

Hey everybody,

Just wanted to give you a quick update and let you know that my package ...HAS....Cooooome!!!! My mom and I were giggling because she really set herself up from last year (when she went all Oprah on me and sent a huge box of my favourite things!) this year, was much more dialed down and with all the hype, extra costs, and stress about getting it to me. once it was finally here it didn't have the rainbow unicorn in it like I felt like it would....heehee it was still excellent of course, just no unicorns....

The first thing I pulled out was a piece of wall art that was supposed to say 'Pray' but the 'R' had fallen off and so the sign just say 'Pay' heehee and then the next thing was a watch with all the numbers fallen down and it said "Whatever, I'm late anyways"  I thought it was so funny.  So much irony!  Thank you to everyone who has been praying and who sent things, it's always fun to open presents, especially when they're sent with such love!

So now there's a new plan in action and if all goes well, I will have my card by the beginning of February!


Wooo! Happy Thursday!
big hugs!!!

Oh the joys!

Well!  If you are reading this, I assume you’re sitting down,  now before you continue reading I’d like you to review what is around you;  make sure you’ve created yourself a safe space - so you won’t knock anything over or when/if  you fall off your chair you will land on something soft, if you’re drinking something maybe stop – so you don’t spit it out all over your screen! 

Do I have you sufficiently excited yet? 
(In my mind I hear a roaring “YEEEEEEeeesSSSS!!! Come on Kayla, get on with it already!”)

OKAY well this month has had it’s share of stressors, the most recent larger one has been a package that my mother sent me at the beginning of the month.  Customs decided that they wanted it, I was informed over the phone on December 14 that if I didn’t have an explanatory letter(and apparently saying that it was Christmas and my family wanted to send me something was NOT a good enough explanation as the woman on the phone rudely told me), translation, and some permission letter from the Costa Rican Ministry of Health by December 15 that my package and all it’s contents would be destroyed!  You can imagine my horror…I had ONE day to get all these documents – some of which would be next to impossible.  Have you ever needed a letter from the Ministry of Health to receive a present in the mail?!  No, me neither!  As it turned out, there had been an issue with the paperwork and so the package was being treated like a commercial shipment.

Now you may be thinking, “Oh Kayla, so dramatic, it’s just some cards and a colouring book, let it go”  weeeeell yes and no.  You see this package also held my childhood stocking – which holds a lot of value to me and a new debit card (I have not been able to take out money from an ATM since October – things have been veeeery tight the past little while).  So, knowing there was no way I’d be able to get the necessary permissions in one day, let alone, one day during Christmas week, I suggested that the package be returned to the sender.  Thinking that at least it wouldn’t be destroyed; only to find out that the Shipper was going to charge somewhere around $300 CAD to get the package back.  I was quite discouraged. 

Fortunately, on the 16th I got a call saying the package was not being destroyed but rather being placed in abandonment until the proper paperwork came.  That the items that were offending Customs (the reason the package was held in the first place – I presume) could be removed and they would send me the rest of the contents!  Great news!  Unfortunately, when I had heard the package was to be destroyed I had called the bank and cancelled the card (the term ‘destroyed’ has different meanings to different people, i.e.. open and claim what you’d like..).  So I played it safe and cancelled and requested a new card (which we are praying comes to me, here in Costa Rica, by the end of the month!). 

So the package was opened and a list of the offending items was made, I signed it saying it was okay to leave those items.  I was told it would take about 24 hours for the package to be released as long as everything went smoothly… haha!  Last week I was told that Customs was saying I’m not registered with them, so they need to do that – it usually takes a day (that initial 24 hours) but for me it had already been over a week…

Last night I was discouraged, thinking about all the things that should be working smoothly, but aren’t, how I've handled things, basically, i was getting bummed out (I’ve been calling the Shipper’s local number multiple times a day do ask about the package – make sure I’m not forgotten (which is normal to do) but it takes it’s toll.  So last night I was laying in bed, talking to God “Hey buddy, what’s going on with this, I’m tired, I’m sick, I don’t know what else to do here….”  I decided that today I would fast all day and see if I got some news, I prayed about how God knows that I’m tired and this shouldn’t be as big of an issue as it’s been.  Then I rolled over and said “NO more thinking, analyzing etc., now I will sleep in peace!”  And i did!!!

So this morning I wake up, dreading the phone call I have to make to Stephanie (the worker who has been with me since the beginning, she’s delightful, but recently has been the bearer of all the bad news haha) so I was laying in bed, deciding if I would call just the once today or twice.  I had been feeling like maybe i was being given the run around, which is common here, that perhaps they weren’t even doing anything and just blaming everything on Customs.  *Phone rings…. I look at the number, it’s Stephanie… I thought “Oh no, what is wrong now?”

“Allo??” (Hello with a Canadian/Spanish accent)

“Hola! Kayla!?  Your package was released today, it’s en route!”

*Jaw drops*  Oooh Lord you work fast, I hadn’t even started my fasting and extra extra intensive prayer plan for today!  

Excellent!  I hang up and am overwhelmed with happiness and since there was no one to hug, my blanket serves as the substitute!

Then I’m wide awake, so excited, God took care of this issue, so I take to my devotional (Jesus Calling, Sarah Young) because I’m just so happy I want to see what it says for today:

“TRUST ME with every fiber of your being!  What I can accomplish in and through you is proportional to how much you depend on Me.  One aspect of this is the degree to which you trust Me in a crisis or major decision.  Some people fail miserably here, while others are at their best in tough times.  Another aspect is even more telling: the constancy of your trust in Me.  People who rely on Me in the midst of adversity may forget about Me when life is flowing smoothly.  Difficult times can jolt you into awareness of your need for Me, whereas smooth sailing can lull you into the stupor of self-sufficiency.
     I care as much about your tiny trust-steps through daily life as about your dramatic leaps of faith.  You may think that no one notices, but the One who is always beside you sees everything – and rejoices.  Consistently trusting in Me is vital to flourishing in My Presence.”

Psalm 40:4  “Oh, the joys of those who trust in the Lord…”

“..when I am afraid, I will put my trust in You.  I praise God for what he has promised.  I trust in God, so why should I be afraid?”  - Psalm 56: 3-4

Psalm 62:8  “O my people, trust in Him at all times.  Pour out your heart to Him for God is our refuge.”

Isaiah 26: 3-4  “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in You, all whose thoughts are fixed on You…”

What a refreshing and encouraging reminder!  I am not alone, and even the trivial things – like a package from home are also important to God. 

Well we thought it was over….after writing this, I saw the company’s truck pull up, raced outside to go get my present!  Only to have it waved in my face and be told that to be able to release the package to me I need to pay (in cash) 62,155.55 Colones (which is about $125 CAD)…I don’t have that kind of cash on hand and therefore wasn’t able to pay, meaning that I saw the present and then watched it drive away.  Left with only a bill in hand and wondering why I hadn’t been told beforehand of these charges.  I had a feeling there would be something, but since nothing was mentioned, I decided not to worry.

Anywho, I guess the waiting and praying will continue…I was hoping to end this with a picture of my present BUT instead I guess we will use it as prayer fuel and hopefully everything can be settled today!

Lima, Llamas, leaders, love, laughing, Latin Link…

what do these all have in common?  They all begin with the letter L!!! AND I experienced all of them during my time in Peru this past month!  It should be officially noted, I quite like Peru, it was so pretty, the mountains are breathtaking!
November flew by!  I had visitors, travels, and a lot of planning for the three Striders that are coming very early next year!  Essentially, tripling the work load I had last year at this time!
The beginning of the month I hosted a Latin Link coordinator from Scotland (he was quite involved with the STEP team I had last April)  he wanted to go see where the team had been, so we went North and the trip was just excellent.  Poor Martin, though,  was trapped in the car with me for a little over 12 hours (total)!   He survived and walked away very encouraged – aside from the day we took him into the back country (in flip flops) and he stepped on an ant hill…we wore him out!  During the visit we got to spend a little time with one of the host families whose daughter (a mother of two young children, see picture: she’s in the pink shirt. her mother is to her right and the woman on my right is the late pastor’s wife* the pastor who passed away during the April Step Team earlier this year) was dying of cancer – it was very serious and the doctors had given up and told the family to buy the funeral clothes and casket.  This year has been very trying on the family, I had tried to visit before and never found them available.  To my surprise and the glory of God, I take Martin up to see the family and who do you think comes waltzing out of the house while we are there?!  The daughter!!!  She’s walking, eating, gaining weight, she was healed!  She herself explained what happened – she doesn’t remember any of the visitors she had or really the time there.  Her mom told me that when they took her off life support she woke up.  The daughter told me that it was like she had been sleeping (dreamless) and then she breathed in something so rich and decadent, it was like the purest oxygen she’d ever experienced.  She woke up and immediately wanted to eat, had energy…the whole deal!  The family and medical team had given up;  now she’s at home with her family and travels 6 hours to the local hospital here in San Jose once a week for testing to ensure that she is in fact healing (which she totally is but the doctors want to keep tabs as miracles aren’t accepted by everyone!  It was so exciting, we’ve been praying for them since April and to see such a 180 degree change is SO encouraging!  God is so good!
After Martin’s visit it was off to Peru for the Latin Link Leadership Conference and crisis management training.  It was so lovely to meet so many people from all the teams in Central and South America!  We had time to share experiences, resources, get some training, it was all in all a very lovely time! (To see more fotos click the following link https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10153803614714165.1073741832.512119164&type=1&l=e45bf9fbd9)
After spending an unexpected day in the El Salvador airport I made it safely back to Costa Rica, with all my new resources and a refreshed outlook on the upcoming months!  Then it was time to meet the Short Term Coordinator for Latin America Mission (Canada)!  She lives in Canada and so we had a good visit and a little logistic strategizing regarding missionaries that LAM will send to Costa Rica.  For those of you not familiar, I work for 2 missions agencies: Latin American Mission (Canada) as well as Latin Link (European), most of my time here on the ground is spent with Latin Link.  I will be assisting LAM with short term missions more in the future, by checking in on their short termers, locations, host families, etc.  I’m excited and looking forward to this next step!

This year has had a lot of emotional ups and downs, times where I have seriously questioned my sanity, discernment, myself in general.  There have been doubts, moments of pure joy, fear, you name it I’ve probably dealt with it this year.  Something that struck me this month during one of my devotionals was that it is important to give God time to respond I just finished up my time in the book of Job this morning (haha yes I’ve been there for a few months, there’s just so much to get out of it!) and after all the agony and questions God finally responds to Job.  He reminds him that he is God, he’s got everything under control!
*Whoa talk about great timing I literally just got back in from stepping outside because for the past hour or so someone has been pounding on a door and as I am trying to write a lovely update post the constant BAM BAM BAM was not very helpful!  So I finished up that last paragraph and went to see what the ruckus was about.  I walked over to find an abuela (grandma) to my neighbour’s kids exhausted and trying to open their front door – she’s been kicking it for about an hour *insert unimpressed expression and I went over and I asked her if she was alright and she goes “I can’t open the door…and I can’t get out of the complex because the keys are in the door” haha so I asked her if I could try and she repeatedly goes “do you think you can get it?!?!?” I tell her I’ll give it a shot.  I turn the key one way, no good, she loudly reminds me not to break the key in the door – which up until that point had been my plan of attack…So! I changed the plan and turned the key the other way *click click…and the door opens!  Voila!  Kayla to the rescue!  Sometimes you just need an outside perspective, someone to come in – oh I've just had an epiphany!  Sometimes we are trying to push ourselves through a door and we just can’t seem to get it to open (figurative door of course), we’re pounding and kicking, fighting to get in.  Like this abuela, then, exhausted from trying to do it alone, allow someone else to help.  We say “God I cannot get this door to open!  He either says “Well you’re not supposed to go through it, hence why it’s locked…”OR “Let me give it a shot” and he opens it for you!  The Bible tells us that God will lead us on the best pathway for our lives (Psalm 32:8) sometimes we’re so busy trying to pound down doors we forget to ask the one who has all the keys.  Or we don’t wait for him to respond, we figure we can handle it ourselves.  Some things take time and we need to give God the opportunity to respond, we bombard him with questions and don’t always give him the space to answer, to open a door, to remind us it’s closed for a reason…
I pray that as you enter this holiday season you will remember to take time to reflect on the doors in your life and whether or not you, like this abuela, are relentlessly pounding instead of asking for help.  Or perhaps the door’s not opening because you have the keys to the wrong apartment or you just need to spend sometime outside enjoying the sunshine :)

Merry Merry Christmas!!!

Ps.  Prayer requests would be that God would give me wisdom and and open the right doors so that I can help to ensure these new Striders will have great placements and really enjoy their time here in Ticolandia!

What a month!

Hello Hello !
Some of you may have received a request from Feedburner to follow the blog, that is because I did not receive a response from you last month (when I sent out my monthly email reminder).  Which, I assume, means you did not receive the email.  As I explained in last month’s reminder it looks like a lot of you have not been receiving any of my correspondence *check your Spam folders* (re: blog updates or personal emails), which makes me quite sad.  Hopefully though, it explains why I haven't heard back from many of you!... at least, I'm hoping that's the reason. :)

**To ensure that I am able to communicate with you if you could please add my email (kaylarchandler@gmail.com) to your address book that would be extremely helpful (and send me a little message if you like, letting me know you’re still alive and well! )**

Okay, now for the fun stuff! This month, like all the others has just flown by!  I’ve experienced quite a few natural disasters- there’s been a few earthquakes (tiny ones, no need to worry), I had a flood, the equivalent of hurricane rain – okay okay I’m exaggerating, because it’s fun and I can!  Yes, it’s been raining a lot, but nothing out of the ordinary and the flood was just in my bedroom – because I forgot to close my window on Sunday…so technically I brought that upon myself – that’s what I get for wanting fresh air!

October started off with me finding my missing chapstick!!!!!! Now, before you scoff and chalk it up to me being a silly girl you should know this beloved chap has been missing since June (I think, I blocked out the time of loss as it was too painful! haha!) then one day I decided to go for a run (and by run I mean walk in running apparel) and BEHOLD in the secret pocket of my shorts was my tiny grapefruity piece of heaven!  How can one not  have a great month with that as the opener!?! 
This month I have really been able to use my home to love on other people (cafecitos, meals, movie nights etc), each week has seen a number of visitors (of the two and four legged variety…), I also was able to host our monthly team meeting here last Sunday.  There has been laughter, hugs, prayers, tears, in some cases screams.  Okay in one case a scream, and it was mine, when I found a rat in my laundry room drain!  I’m fairly certain I scared him more than he scared me haha he smashed his head on the grate and booked it out of there, hopefully never to return!

“All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.” – 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

It’s been a really exciting month in terms of seeing growth!  I’ve had quite a few people come to me for prayer and guidance and many of the situations they’re facing are things that I’ve dealt with in the past.  I have been able to comfort them the way God comforted/s me – well not exactly the same as I am not God, obviously. It is just such a blessing to be entrusted with that kind of responsibility.
A friend of mine got a peek into a day in the life of Kayla a few weeks ago.  She tagged along with me and experienced the joy that it is to have your debit cards rejected multiple times from the ATM, get no help from the local bank, need to run around for hours trying to determine what the problem could be, if the local ATM robbed your money or it’s simply out of order, she got to sit with me on the phone with the Canadian bank and after the entire morning passed away finally be able to take out enough money to pay for a needed vaccine (because I’m going to Peru next month!!!).  After we finally got everything done (bank, vaccine, visit to the health ministry to get a card saying I was vaccinated – which i was told would take days and only ended up taking minutes, God works everything out!!!) with an exasperated look on her face  - she said “Kayla?! Have you always been this patient??” to which I chuckled, “definitely NOT!”  not really knowing what else to say.  I know that God has been helping me with patience, especially since I started praying for it a few years back (a risky move, I must say). So far though, I’m still alive ;)

>>> Joy is not dependant on circumstances <<<
but it’s a lot easier when there’s so much to be thankful for!

>I’ve been setting up things for my THREE (if everything works out) new Striders, scheduled to come early next year<

>Thanksgiving was celebrated with a Bourne marathon and “cheddar” cheese!!!<

>The Latin Link Coordinator from Scotland is coming for a visit in a few weeks and I’ll be taking him to Valle Verde where the team was in April, so that he can meet some of the community<

Prayers needed:

• My friend’s mother recently had corrective eye surgery and while the procedure seemed to have gone smoothly her blood pressure is extremely high and the eyes are very swollen.  Please pray that the swelling and BP go down and that she makes a full and quick recovery.  Additionally, their family business has been receiving hassle from the municipality and they have been evicted from space that they’ve been renting (they run a small homeopathic pharmacy) because the owner wants to change the contract so she can charge more for rent.  It’s been a rough month for their family, please keep them in your prayers.
• My mom let me know that a woman we know back home has been diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer.  Please pray for healing and comfort for her and her family.
• November 13-22 I will,  Lord willing, be in Peru for a Latin Link leadership conference!  Please pray for safe travel and that the conference will go well and we will have good speakers, conversation, fellowship and it will just be an excellent time overall.
• Financial stability, the Lord, is always faithful, let’s keep it that way :)

^“Search for the Lord and for his strength; continually seek him.”  
Psalm 105:4